Character Study

I am playing Lili from A Wall Of Fire Rising. The whole scene will be a collection of short vignettes that illustrate the deterioration of Guy and Lili's relationship. Their son is not a part of the scene, therefore the main focus remains spotlighted on gender roles, sexual disfunction and tension, and a loss of love. The scenes take place over a span of 10(ish) years by beginning when Lili discovered her pregnancy and ends when Guy kills himself. Lili is in her late 20s and is pretty, however not gorgeous. She represents the average mother. She dresses modestly, wears her hair back and does not wear any jewelry.

Lili is contastly conflicted. She wants to be the perfect housewife, but as Guy becomes more internally inferior, she feels the need to become more outwardly aggressive. She forces herself to become more powerful, and confronting. Although she has a lot on her mind, she holds everything in. She never talks about things, she internalizes everything and takes her broken relationship as a personal dig to her own humanity. She is beyond sad that she has lost a strong husband, but even more sad that she lost love. She was in love with Guy, but not anymore. This motivates all her scenes, she always has things to say but never does. She is uncomfortable with silence but usually has nothing meaningful to fill it with. She rambles and talks quickly to avoid talking about real problems.

Eventually, Lili gives up on Guy and puts all her energy into her son. The only thing keeping her going is the idea of her son's success. However, her loss of romantic love is slowly destroying her. Due to this, she walks very heavy, but also with purpose. She knows what she must do for her son so she works very hard to provide for him. She resents her husband for burdening her with all the household and child care responsibilities. She holds a lot of anger and this further hinders their relationship. Along with the anger and sadness, she also holds her own fears and insecurities. She worries that she isn't enough, and in the back of her mind also wonders if she is the reason Guy can't rise up to the occasion. She talks very slowly, but still aggressively. Lili knows what she must do, but constantly questions what she did to destroy her home and marriage. She pretends to blame everything on Guy, but in reality feels it may be her fault.